News Updates, 5/4

Catholics attack Dan Brown film Angels and Demons
Catholic leaders have attacked the film sequel to The Da Vinci Code for its "gratuitously outlandish" portrayal of the Church.
[Dopey Opie says Catholics "will enjoy the movie for what it is - an exciting mystery, set in the awe-inspiring beauty of Rome."]

Cleveland bishop reverses another church closing
Parishioners staged strong campaign to save their parish

Archbishop may suspend rebel Brisbane priest
Used Buddhist statues and women preachers at Mass

U.S. House passes expansion of 'hate crime' bill
Definition now includes attack on sexual orientation

Pope's visit to Israel sparks high hopes
Will Benedict XVI support two-state solution?

Priests urged to take precautions against flu
Refrain from serving wine at Communion during Mass

Ron Howard: Vatican obstructed 'Angels & Demons'
Director says Holy See thwarted his filming permits

Pa. bishop criticizes college over Casey speech
Pro-abortion senator spoke on Catholic campus

World's oldest Benedictine monk dies
Father Theodore Heck was 108-years-old

Ultrasound bill wins passage from Texas Senate
'Choose Life' vehicle license plate bill also passes

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Other News
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From The Onion: Nation Ready To Be Lied To About Economy Again
After nearly four months of frank, honest, and open dialogue about the failing economy, a weary U.S. populace announced this week that it is once again ready to be lied to about the current state of the financial system...In addition, citizens are requesting that the phrase, "It will only get worse before it gets better," be permanently replaced with, "Things are going great. Enjoy yourselves."...
[Truth or parody or both?]

Mexico Extends school closures to May 11
[Everything is getting better, right?]

After Obama's Speech, How Much Would Corporate America Pay to See His Real Birth Certificate?
After lying to the American people today about American corporations using "illegal" tax havens and bashing corporate America in general, how much do you think corporate America would pay today to see B.O.'s real long-form birth certificate?

Second Wave may return “with a vengeance” in the months ahead
The head of the World Health Organisation hit back at critics who have accused it of over-reaction to the swine flu crisis, warning it may return “with a vengeance” in the months ahead...

Swine Flu May Merge With Other Flu Viruses, CDC Says
Swine flu’s potential to reconfigure its genetic material and become more deadly is a “major concern,” said Anne Schuchat, a scientist with the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention...

Worries Rise on the Size of U.S. Debt
As the Obama administration racks up an unprecedented spending bill for bank bailouts, Detroit rescues, health care overhauls and stimulus plans, the bond market is starting to push up the cost of trillions of dollars in borrowing for the government...

Fed Buys $8.5 Billion in Treasurys
The Federal Reserve Bank of New York bought $8.5 billion in Treasurys on Monday, its biggest purchase to date under its program aimed at improving conditions in private credit markets and spurring lending...

Obama plans corporate tax crackdown
Obama on Monday spelled out his plans to close corporate tax loopholes on U.S. multinational corporations and crack down on overseas tax havens.