Satan to receive honorary degree at GeorgetownWhat so-called Catholic university would be the first to host the Prince of Darkness were he to appear in the flesh? I fear that many would be clamoring to book him while rejecting Our Lord and Saviour as too divisive and fundamentalist.
Georgetown University President John J. DeGoya announced today that Satan, Prince of Darkness will receive an honorary doctorate at the University's 220th commencement.
DeGoya called the announcement a proud day for Georgetown. "We've been honored to continue the proud tradition of Catholic education which has produced alumni such as President Bill Clinton, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and World Spiritual Leader Al Gore, but when Notre Dame scored the Messi-- uh, the Pres__ent [Id missing] for this year's graduation, well, it didn't seem fair. "
"We felt being named the fighting Irish gave them an unfair advantage with O'bama. The faculty felt like complete, pathetic losers, sorta like their football team. But now we've booked the Prince of this world to be our commencement speaker. This gives Father Jerkings yet another reason to regret telling us to choke on it."
Law School Dean Ben Doverenakov dismissed the protests of extremist right-wing homophobic Latin-Mass-loving student terrorist groups. "Having Our Dark Master as our commencement speaker in no way means that we are not absolutely committed to protecting the sacred right to life. We know he has some certain positions which Rome forbids us to directly endorse, but the student body deserves to hear how the Earth is over-populated with those nasty breast-sucking parasites anyway."
Doverenakov stated he considered this a vital moment of dialog which will enrich all parties involved. "As for Satan, we consider this a teaching moment."
Friday, March 27, 2009
So As Not To Be Outdone By the Notre Dame/Obama Fiasco...
We have this via email today: