See thou have God before thine eyes, and do not contend with complaining words. And if at present thou seem to be overcome, and to suffer a confusion which thou hast not deserved, do not repine at this, and do not lessen thy crown by impatience. Rather look up to Me in heaven, who am able to deliver thee from all confusion and wrong, and to repay everyone according to his works.
- Bk. III, ch. xxxvi.
You (the Prioress) were ill at the time with bronchitis, and we had been rather anxious about you. One morning I came to the infirmary to return the keys of the Communion grille, as I was sacristan. I was secretly pleased at having an opportunity of seeing you, but another Sister, fearing lest I should wake you, came forward to take the keys herself. I assured her, as politely as I could, that I was just as anxious as she was not to disturb you, but that it was my right to return the keys. Today I understand how much more perfect it would have been to have yielded, but not realizing it then, I insisted on going in.
The very thing we wanted to avoid then happened, for the noise made you open your eyes. The Sister made a long speech, the gist of it being that it was my fault that you had been disturbed. I was longing to defend myself, but suddenly had a bright idea. I saw that if I began to excuse myself I would only lose my peace of mind, but that I had too little virtue to refrain from doing so. The only thing left was to run away, which I promptly did. My heart was beating so fast that I was obliged to sit on the stairs and enjoy the fruits of victory for a few minutes. Although this was an odd way of showing my bravery, I thought it better not to engage in combat when defeat was certain.
- Histoire d'une Ame (The Story of a Soul)
For a List of Abbreviations, see this post.
Adapted from Just For Today(©1943 Burns & Oates)
Nihil Obstat: Reginaldus Phillips, S.T.L.,Censor deputatus
Imprimatur: Edwardus Myers, Vic. Cap.