It is not at all impossible that at the prospect of certain serious events fear assails me.
Not that I doubt the victory of God, whatever happens. I know well that He is Master, that He will remain so eternally; I have faith and hope.
It is only that I am not yet generous enough to endure the suffering entailed in the gift of my life, if it were necessary.
It is not that I imagine for one moment that God could abandon me, or that His fidelity, by any chance, would grow weary.
But without my wishing it, I am not at peace. After all, what if such and such an event does occur? Such a thing has happened before. It can happen again. And again I am the prey of worry.
After a sort of retreat a Protestant wrote to conquer his fear: "Fear, fear! Fear! Just for the sake of curiosity let us look back at the end of a week and calculate the nervous energy spent in anticipating troubles and accidents which could happen to us. Many people employ a great part of their conscious life in suffering through presentiment, anticipation, in creating worries for themselves out of trifles, which may or may not happen to them."
What should I do, then? Trust myself to God, frequently renewing acts of calm, resolute submission to the ineffable Power which leads and controls the world.
"O Lord, I believe that You hold all in Your hands; that nothing can happen to me that You have not wished or permitted, that not a hair can fall from my head if You do not allow it. I abandon myself to You, infinite sovereignty and wish to live at peace. I plunge myself into the infinite calm of Your Omnipotence and of Your all-embracing Love. The blacker the sky the more truly will You be my only Star."
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Adapted from Meditations for Religious
by Father Raoul Plus, S.J. (© 1939, Frederick Pustet Co.)
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